My biggest business failure was actually a gift

Happy Wednesday!

This week, I'm sharing a few thoughts after publishing my latest YouTube video.

My YouTube channel is still a baby, so one of the pieces of advice I'm following is to post searchable, evergreen content - things like 'How to get your first clients'. However, my latest video is more philosophical and personal, and honestly it's been my favourite to film so far. YouTube theory says I should make around 4 'how-to' videos for every 1 'thought-leadership' type video, so this is my first one.

Feel free to check it out HERE.

I'm sharing openly about my biggest business failure, and how I actually learnt more from that than from anything else I've done in business. My tech start-up back in 2018 taught me exactly what type of business I did NOT want to build - and what type I DO want instead (which is the type of business I have now).

It taught me about the importance of INTENTIONALITY. Of asking ourselves: WHY?

The other day, someone asked me: 'Exactly WHY do you actually want to become a digital nomad?'

I thought I had a perfect answer as it's something I've dreamt about for decades. But in that moment, I wasn't that clear!

I took the question away and really thought about it. Sometimes we fear questioning our own life choices. But it's far better to do this periodically so we can adjust - rather than push through with something we decided was a good idea at some point in the past.

After some reflection, I confirmed that YES, I absolutely want this chapter of digital nomad life. I want to travel extensively, experience new cultures, have lots of fun, be adventurous, connect with my essence, and not be limited by any one location. I got even more excited about it after sitting with it in my journal and reflections :-)

Back to my YouTube video, the point I want the viewer to walk away with is this: in order to live a life entirely on our terms, we must be intentional. What's interesting is that it's actually not that easy to know what we intrinsically TRULY want, versus what we THINK we should want. It takes inner work to decipher the two, because we live in societies where we're constantly told there's only certain ways to do things. Breaking away from that requires deciding our own version of success.

My biggest 'business failure' was actually a blessing in disguise. It taught me so much about who I am and what I want through that raw, lived experience, and allowed me to pivot quickly towards something far more desirable. Honestly? I'm glad I wasn't materially successful with that business - it would have been so much harder to walk away.

Now, with every big decision (whether in business or life), I ask myself:

• What is my OWN definition of success here?

• What sort of person do I want to BECOME in the process of pursuing this?
• How do I want to FEEL - not just when I arrive, but along the way? 

So why do I care so much about intentional living?

Because I've lived what it's like to follow what society tells us to follow. And once you wake up from that 'Matrix', you can't unsee it. It's so liberating to carve your own path - to live fully awake, fully immersed, fully aligned. Otherwise we're just surviving day to day, living by someone else's expectations. I tried for a long time, but I got so sick of masking, pretending, and living up to others’ idea of happiness and success.

I've gone against the grain in almost every aspect of my life by this point!

• I've never wanted my own biological children (and now I don't have a uterus so it's def never going to happen lol)
• I grew up in a strict Catholic family and then came out as gay/mostly gay (for me it's more of a spectrum - I'd say about 80% gay :))
• I left two prestigious, status-ey careers - Medicine and being an Officer in the British Army
• I packed up, rented my house in Birmingham and sold my car, to move to London to live with my mum in my late 30s (one of the best decisions I've ever made)
• I've had multiple businesses, which carry far more uncertainty than the safe path I could have stayed on as a doctor

These things weren't easy. Even for someone somewhat rebellious like me, it's been really hard to overcome the pressures, expectations and demands instilled in me - societally and by family. So I do get that it is so much easier said than done.

I know people my age who’ve always been deeply attracted to the same sex but remain in unhappy opposite sex relationships because it feels too hard to break away from external expectations. I know people deeply unhappy in their careers who stay because it pay wells and brings security. I know people who are bored with where they live, who don't move because they're too comfortable.

None of that is a criticism - I know TOO WELL what it's like. But we simply can’t be fully happy or fulfilled as long as we remain out of alignment. I certainly wasn't happy when I was in similar situations.

At some point, we have to give ourselves permission to BE WHO WE ARE - to break away, and to live life on our terms.

Authenticity and being values-aligned is at the core of every decision I make. If it's not aligned, I ain't doing it. And life becomes simpler and far more joyful when we remain true to ourselves, no matter what.

I’d love for you to ask yourself (in a kind, compassionate way):

How authentically am I living my life right now? 

Where are my deepest desires not aligned with my current actions? 

Where could I start making more aligned choices?

If reading any part of this made you feel resistant or uncomfortable - that in itself could be a signal. We often feel that discomfort because part of us knows we aren't fully aligned. If that's happening, maybe try some journaling and see what comes up. Not from judgement, but from curiosity. Because awareness is always the first step towards meaningful change.

Wishing you a lovely rest of your week, 

Warmly,

Marcela